50: Stuck in the Comparison Trap? How to Ignite Your Trailblazer Energy!
Jan 29, 2024Like it or hate it, we just can’t help comparing ourselves to others. Whether it be our looks, intelligence, success, or wealth, the comparison trap is real – but especially when it comes to our health.
We know deep down that our bodies are all unique. Yet, that little voice inside nags us, making us believe we should be mirroring someone else's journey. While comparison is completely normal, it's crucial not to let it become a roadblock on your path, leading to a place of despair.
Your health journey is yours and yours alone. Here, we look at how to embrace diversity, stay in your lane, and draw inspiration from others – WITHOUT spiraling into something that takes you further away from your goals.
Can Comparison be Helpful?
Comparing your journey to others can be a learning tool – when you approach it with a growth mindset. It's not about mimicking someone else's journey; it's about figuring out what works uniquely for YOU.
Especially when it comes to anti-obesity medications, there's a lot of groupthink going on where one voice gets really loud, everyone gets influenced by it, and then everyone thinks that they need to do the same thing. The tricky part is, we know our bodies are all different, but deep down, we still feel like we should get the exact same results as others.
In reality, we don’t have many things in common with that person, we have different genes, and our lives look completely different. And so comparing in this context often just leads to frustration and despair rather than genuine progress.
The Primal Craving for Connection
As social beings, we crave connection and a sense of belonging. Straying from the crowd triggers an alarm inside our brain that going against the norm is “unsafe”.
That might trigger thoughts like, “Well, everyone else is doing that. Why do I think that I can go and do something different?”
Diet culture would suggest that you need a rigid calorie number, a perfect streak with exercise, and that everything needs to be done perfectly. And so if you are going to do things in a different way, you need to have some faith and trust in that process. You need to hold out long enough to see if you get the results that you want in a different way.
That is often trailblazer energy. Trailblazers do not look at others to figure out the way. They cultivate their own values and beliefs and believe things long enough for them to appear physically in their life.
How to Escape The Comparison Trap
When you find that you're entering the comparison trap, take a step back and ask yourself, “Is it helpful if I do it this way?” Sometimes, it can be inspiring. For example, when I watch those 24-hour "what I eat in a day" videos, it sparks some new ideas for me. (In fact, this recent video on TikTok helped me to discover the cottage cheese pizza bowl!)
But the point is, I wasn’t comparing myself to this person’s weight loss journey. I simply took a useful lesson from it without falling into the negative comparison energy.
For those who often find themselves comparing, I encourage you to get curious. Why do you feel the need to do this? Has this worked out well for you in the past? Do you want to do it differently now? Can you just look at these different scenarios but not get to the place of despairing about your own situation?
The flip side of “compare and despair” is judgment, which we also need to be careful of. Judgment is where you find yourself feeling morally superior because of the way in which you're doing something.
It's easy to slip into the mindset of, "My way is the best, and everyone should know it!" But the irony is that, in doing so, we often mirror the harsh self-criticism we direct inward. We can't assume that the path that you're on is perfect for everyone or vice versa. And that’s why I always believe that staying in your own lane is best when it comes to your own unique health journey.
Embracing Diversity
Ultimately, you're going to figure out whichever path works for you. Imagine your journey as sailing across the sea. We all have different tools – some may have a sailboat, some a speedboat, and others might be rowing with their own strength. The waves and currents may vary, but each boat charts its course uniquely.
So stay on your path. Comparison is expected, normal and natural, but let's not let it hold you back and get to the place of despair. And let's not also sit there and judge other people because we don't know what each individual may need in the long run.