103: The Easy vs. Hard Road: How to Stop Feeling Stuck and Start Moving Forward

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Do you ever feel like you’re stuck on the "hard road," where every step forward is a struggle, and progress seems just out of reach? Maybe you feel trapped by past mistakes, or overwhelmed by an uncertain future. Today, I want to share something with you that might just change how you see things…

One of my absolute favorite books is Chasing Cupcakes by Elizabeth Benton, and I can honestly say it has the power to transform the way we approach our personal journeys. In this blog, I’ll walk you through the key hallmarks of the “hard” road, showing you the patterns that keep you trapped, and more importantly, how you can choose to walk the easier path—one where progress, growth, and lasting success are possible.

Key Characteristics of the “Hard Road”

In Chasing Cupcakes, Elizabeth Benton breaks down the traits of the "hard road" and how we often unknowingly choose this path. Below, I’ve highlighted some of the key characteristics of the hard road from the book—things that can make your journey feel like an uphill battle. Keep reading and see if any of these resonate with you and how they might be showing up in your life.

• Valuing novelty, new approaches, and intensity over consistency
  It’s easy to fall into the trap of thinking a new, intense method will be the answer to everything. But jumping from one new thing to the next usually leads to burnout. What really works in the long run is sticking to something that’s simple, sustainable, and consistent.
• Putting off until later what you don't feel like prioritizing today
  Procrastination often comes from trying to tackle everything at once, and that’s when overwhelm kicks in. Remember: You’re not going to change everything overnight. When I work with people, I start with something simple—like getting enough water. It seems small, but if you’re not even hydrating properly, how can you expect to focus on complex nutrition changes? When you’re tempted to put things off because it feels like "today’s not the day," the key is to ask, "What’s the one small thing I can do today that will help me take better care of myself?" Even a little progress is better than no progress.
• Focusing on skill set more than mindset
  A lot of people think if they just learn more or find the "perfect" plan, everything will fall into place. But the truth is, making real progress starts with the mindset. If you trust yourself, your body, and your instincts, that’s when things really click. You might keep looking for the best new diet, but the key to your success is trusting that you already have the tools you need—like listening to your body and finding a routine that fits your life.
• Investing energy in the problem instead of acting on the solution
  It's easy to get stuck in the "why" of things not working, but that keeps you in a negative cycle. Focusing on solutions instead of problems is what moves you forward. Yes, it’s tempting to keep complaining about not losing weight, but it’s more helpful to start thinking about how to fix the things that might be holding you back, like emotional eating or poor sleep.
• Making yourself a victim of factors outside of your control
  Blaming external factors can feel good in the moment, but it doesn’t actually help you move forward. Focus on what you can control, and you’ll feel more empowered.
  For example, at an event, the food might not be as healthy as you’d expected, and it’s easy to get frustrated. But instead of blaming the situation, think about how you can prep snacks next time or plan ahead for those moments.
• Making decisions based on emotion instead of principle
  Emotions can lead us to make impulsive choices that don’t align with our long-term goals. It's better to make decisions based on what really matters to you—your principles—especially when emotions are running high. When the scale goes up, it’s easy to turn to comfort food. But instead of letting emotions dictate your actions, stick to your long-term goal of balanced eating, even if it’s tough in the moment.
• Trying to do everything right instead of focusing on doing the right thing
  Perfectionism can make us freeze. Trying to do everything perfectly often leads to frustration and burnout. It’s better to focus on the right things—those small steps that keep you on track—even if they’re not perfect. If you try to follow a perfect meal plan, you’ll likely get discouraged when you can’t stick to it. Instead, just focus on making small wins—like choosing a healthier snack instead of a processed one.
• Talking yourself into an excuse instead of talking yourself into progress
  Everyone faces setbacks. The key is not letting those setbacks turn into excuses. Instead of saying, “I can’t do this,” try reframing it to, “I didn’t get it perfect today, but I’m still moving forward.” When things don’t go as planned, don’t give up. Reframe your thinking and remind yourself that each day is a new opportunity to move closer to your goal.
• Focusing more on the journey and opinions of others than your own

It’s easy to get caught up in comparing your progress to others, but constantly switching paths based on someone else’s results will only take you off track. Focus on your own journey and what works for you, not what others are doing. Comparison can show you what you want, but it shouldn’t derail your progress. Your path is unique, and that’s what matters.

Key Characteristics of the “Easy Road”

On the other hand, the "easy road" mindset focuses on cultivating sustainable habits that help you break free from stress and perfectionism. It encourages simplifying your journey and embracing consistent actions instead of chasing extremes or quick fixes. This approach empowers you to make steady progress in a way that feels manageable and fulfilling. Here are some of the key hallmarks of the easy road:

1. Valuing consistency over intensity and novelty
   Focus on sustainable habits that are achievable over time, rather than on short bursts of intense effort or fleeting trends.
2. Win the moment you're in, leave yesterday and tomorrow out of it
   Embrace the present moment and let go of past failures or future anxieties, focusing only on what you can do today.
3. Commit to improving your mindset and perspective every day
   Invest in cultivating a positive mindset daily by surrounding yourself with supportive influences and aligning your thoughts with your goals.
4. Investing energy in creating solutions instead of making a case for the problem
   Shift from complaining about challenges to proactively solving them, empowering yourself to move forward with creative solutions.
5. Take advantage of what you can control and don’t waste energy on what you can’t
   Direct your energy toward actions within your control and release the stress of worrying about things you cannot change.
6. Practice principle-based reactions instead of emotionally-fused reactions
   Respond thoughtfully to challenges by aligning your actions with your core values rather than reacting impulsively based on emotions.
7. Focusing on doing the right thing instead of doing all the right things
   Let go of perfectionism and prioritize what truly matters to your well-being and goals, focusing on meaningful progress.
8. Keep your eye on your own work, waste no energy comparing your journey to others
   Avoid the trap of comparison and stay focused on your own unique path, appreciating your own progress and growth.
9. Seize every opportunity to break away from past patterns
   Embrace opportunities to change old habits and create new ones that better support your growth and success.

In summary, the "easy road" isn’t always the quickest or most glamorous, but it is the path that supports true transformation. By embracing consistency, staying present, and focusing on mindset over perfection, you can create a healthier, more balanced life that feels empowering and achievable.

Psst: Enjoyed this content?

I’m excited to announce that in the coming weeks, I’ll be launching a paid podcast option! You’ll get an additional weekly episode with exclusive content—workshops, in-depth personal updates, and expert advice on topics like weight management, medications, and more. Plus, I’ll be answering fan mail questions and diving into deeper conversations tailored for a smaller, dedicated community. Stay tuned!